flying off in < 6 hours time!!

in bout 5.5 hours more and i'll be in the air on the way to kunming for my first mission trip!! God bless my journey there and back. Praise the Lord for providing for us the finance needed and such. really wanna thank all my frenz who ordered the cheesecakes from me.

boy, i'm feeling pretty excited now. haha... hope i've packed everything in. about half of the stuff i'm bringing there is not mine lo. and i think when i come back, it'll be the same. lol. i hope i dun fall sick there. must enjoy every minute and every second there, cos come back is back to school liao. man, when you have long holidays, you really dun feel like going back to school.

hope i learn lots of stuff there, esp during the summer camp at Dali for the students there. i'm sure there're lots for me to learn. God, refresh my mind!!

ahh.. think i'll miss you guys, or maybe not. maybe i'll be too busy to think of u guys. lol. but dun worry, i'll try to buy some goodies for you guys, if i got the time to shop around and got the money. lol.

dun miss me ya? ahh.. dun think anyone will miss me ba. lol. cya all in bout 2 weeks time. oh ya, i'll be back on the 10th.

God bless!

u know you think too much when...

u know you think too much about something when...

1. it is the first thing that comes to your mind when u wake up,
2. it is the last thing on your mind when you are about to sleep,
3. during your awake hours it keeps coming to your mind,
4. you cannot fully focus on what you want to do,
5. however hard you try to use some other thing to keep your mind busy, it just doesn't work,
6. you feel frustrated whenever u think about it,
7. u feel it like cancer in your body and u just want to amputate it, but you cannot chop off your head,
8. you think so much that you cannot get to sleep,
9. when you do get to sleep, you dream about it,
10. you start thinking how much you are thinking about it and coming up with stupid lists to tell people you think too much.

well, praise the Lord 8 and 9 have not happened to me yet, so i guess i'm still ok. thank God i still have my sleep, and i do not have dreams about it.

if only i am always thinking of Jesus in ways like the above...

feeling lazy...

man i feel lazy today. woke up in the morning to deliver cheesecake. ZzzZ...

after i came back home, originally planned to go gym, but then after i on my computer, think i decided to just slack at home. lol. been so busy lately, with pastor zhang's trainings, racial harmony which is finally over, and making and delivering cheesecakes. it's holidays!! but i can't remember if i ever had the chance to just laze around at home. even now i can only laze around for a couple of hours, then afternoon need to deliver cheesecake again.. arrgh... but today last day to deliver liao, after this, NO MORE!! wahaha... man, do i feel exhausted.

though very busy, but this holiday is pretty fruitful. learnt lotsa new stuff, and grew in my relationship with God too! woohoo! so glad that God sent pastor zhang to come and train us. i must grab this opportunity to learn as much as i can, and use what i learnt for Him!!

going for mission trip this fri nite liao. so fast. holidays coming to an end already. after come back from mission trip, it's back to studies again. must work hard this semester. i wanna get all As!!

*sigh* something is occupying too much of my mind, but i can't seem to get rid of it. this is not good, but yet i have no idea what i can do about it!! i've been praying everyday about this, and that is all i know now that can help. maybe i should confide in somebody. actually i do la. but i dun like to keep bothering others with my own problems. sometimes i dunno if it's my work or it's this that is making me feel tired and exhausted. it's so hard for me to focus on what i want to do nowadays, i feel so mentally drained. i know this area of my life is one of my weakest, and i guess God wants to put me through the test, and strenghten me in this area. but man, it's really hard... so hard... but i cannot give up. i must continue to believe that God will tide me through, and make a way out for me. being such a CS(the DISC test) person that i am, it's especially hard. i keep thinking about it and pondering about it.

it has been a while since i felt this way. the last time this occured was in sec 4/JC days. and i sure took a long time to get over it. i always take very long to get over such things, and these are some of the the roughest patches of my life. it's so bad i'm really afraid to go through it again, but it's all coming back. what i'm afraid most is coming back to me.

Oh God, please help me!!!

no time...?

God spoke to me just now. was in a conversation with lingling on MSN, and was talking bout commitments then was saying that sometimes get so busy until we got no time for God, something like that la. then suddenly God is saying to me, "No time? Isn't all the time you have given to you by Me?"

oh man, this really struck me. yeah man, all the time that i have, it's all given to me by God, and if he wants to claim some of the time back, or even all of it, He has the rights to do it. who am i to say that i have no time for God? everytime i say that i have no time is just an excuse...

what about you? if God wants you to give Him your time, are you willing?

I am.. and I want to use it all for You.

Amen.

busy week ahead

time passes really fast. 2+ months of my holidays have passed, and in a month's time i'll have to be back in school attending boring lectures and tutorials again. how sad. i'm really enjoying the time working in church. get to learn alot of stuff, be it spiritually or otherwise. i'm so glad i have the chance to work in church.

this coming week is gonna be such a busy week. lessons by pastor zhang every evening except wednesday, and what's more is the upcoming racial harmony project at Republic Poly on fri and sat. the only free evening i might have is taken up by worship practice also. but the sad thing is i'll have to miss friday's evening seminar and sat's special training by pastor zhang. i gotta be at RP to help out. haiz... wonder what will i miss...

then after this coming week, next mon still got seminar, tues is prayer meeting, wednesday is mission team meeting, and that leaves me only thursday evening to be free, cos fri nite i'm flying off to china already!! and that means i have to spend that evening packing all my stuff... man... and after i come back, it's school again.

wat a busy holiday... duno to be happy or sad... haha.. but at least it feels like a holiday well spent la. lol.

first full actual day wedding assignment...

finally took up my first full actual day wedding assignment last sat. man, it was tiring. mebbe cos i didnt have enough sleep the nite before also la. it was a good experience, and i learnt more stuff, as well as some areas where i'm really not good in and need alot of improvements. for one, my control of the crowd is really bad. not vocal enough, sometimes dun really dare to speak out loud. still not good at capturing the special moments, and getting angles also not good enough. wa too much to improve on. one thing i learnt is that to even just go part-time wedding photographer, i still have a long way to go. sheesh...

mebbe when i get permission to post the photos online then i'll do so.