Love and Marriage

Love is a complicated thing. We think in terms of feelings. Hormones get the best of us. When the feelings, flee love vanishes. We respond by saying, “I don’t love her any more.” Love is a lot more than palpitating hearts and flushed faces. The Bible defines love in terms of God. “The one who does not love does not know God, for God is love” (1 John 4:8).

A further definition is helpful. “This is love, that we walk according to His commandments” (2 John 1:6). God’s commandments are ten. They circumscribe the loving righteous life. Jesus Christ is the supreme demonstration. He kept the whole law perfectly. We come full circle. “The whole Law is fulfilled in one word, in the statement, ‘You shall love your neighbor as yourself’” (Galatians 5:14).

Love respects parents. Love preserves life and wards off death. Love shuns affairs and is chaste. Love respects the property of others. Love values truth. Love is not greedy or lustful or jealous. This is concrete, objective, and measurable.

Young people with regular unmarried bed partners speak of making love. They fall far short of God. “Those who practice such things will not inherit the kingdom of God” (Galatians 5:21). By the grace of God, couples working on marriage in terms of truthfulness, respect, and fidelity live much closer to God’s standard.

A Marriage in Christ

"There is nothing more lovely in life than the union of two people whose love for one another has grown through the years from a small acorn of passion to a great rooted tree. Surviving all vicissitudes, and rich with its manifold branches, every leaf holding its own significance." --Vita Sackville-West

In the Bible, we are told of the ultimate relationship between husband and wife; it is God's desire for husband and wife to no longer be two beings on separate paths, but be united as one flesh. ("For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh." - Ephesians 5:31)

The word 'united' in this verse refers to being joined, as one, connected. The reason for this bonded state is quite simple and is explained in the following verse: "He who loves his wife loves himself. After all, no one ever hated his own body, but he feeds and cares for it, just as Christ does the church - for we are members of his body." - Ephesians 5:28-29

We are also told husbands should love their wives in such a way that the female is built up and blessed by her husband's presence.

Think, for a moment, of the type of marital relationship that would result in a wife (bride) actually being edified by her husband (groom). Logically, there would have to be complete trust, mutual respect, kindness, caring, and obviously, a genuine love. A wife, who regards her spouse in this manner, has no problem placing her very life in the arms of her husband, for he will love his bride as he loves his own body.

While it is true these verses in Ephesians discuss the unique union of husband and wife, they, at the same time, are used to describe our relationship with Jesus Christ, who is often referred to in the Bible, as the "groom," with the body of Believer's or Church called the "bride."

How great a love Christ has for us! A love so strong that nothing can separate us from him. Just as husband and wife are joined as one, those who place their trust, their very life, in Christ's hands are members of his body. As Christ's bride, (those who believe in him) place the Groom (Jesus Christ, the Son of God) at the head of the Church, we, too, must place Christ at the forefront of our lives.

"Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you." - Hebrews 13:5